I don't know this girl, but I posted this specific picture because I found it on Photobucket & I don't understand why people get their tax checks & then take a quick pic with their money...okay you're about to go take this to pay your rent but you gotta show off to the world real quick? ummm...FAIL
"Failure should be our teacher, not our undertaker. Failure is delay, not defeat. It is a temporary detour, not a dead end. Failure is something we can avoid only by saying nothing, doing nothing, and being nothing." (Denis Waitley)
Everyone is not going to be a winner. That's why there's only 1 Gold Medal at the Olympics. In everyday life, we strive to be better, daily. We are encouraged to be better than our parents were, or to overcome our mistakes. But things that are perceived as epic failures...not getting that promotion, not getting that raise, not making that sale, etc...these are only temporary setbacks. When you allow that failure to permeate your existence, then you are allowing your life to become one big epic failure. You can't point the finger at anyone but yourself.
Case in point: take me for example.
My son Tonie died of SIDS, Thanksgiving Day 2006. I always tell my story about Tonie because I am not ashamed of his death. What I am ashamed of is how I let his death kill me for years before I realized that I am still alive and have a daughter to take care of.
I read somewhere that 16% of marriages end in divorce due to the death of a child. I don't think that's an accurate number, but I think that only 16% are willing to tell the truth about it. Yeah you hear that there's no real way to grieve for a child's death, but grieving leads to anger & all kinds of other marital problems. I should know...but this post isn't about that, primarily.
For 4 years, the death of our son crippled our marriage & individual lives in every way that you could imagine. Before this, I was a driven, confident, self-assured young 22 year old who had just graduated from college & had landed a Human Resources Assistant job at Lowe's without even really trying. Afterwards, I didn't care. I worked retail & a thankless call center job while I went home to an empty bed most nights. My husband pretty much mentally checked out for about 6 months & the only thing that really kept us together at that time was that I was pregnant again with our daughter. And even after her birth, my focus, drive, spirit...was all a moot point. My focus was skewed into all sorts of unnecessary directions & drama infected my life like AIDS. We broke up & made up more times than you could imagine...we're better now, but we definitely were taken to the brink...
I'm a spiritual person, & I know that Satan has truly tried to do everything he can to put asunder what God clearly put together. It's truly a miracle that we're still together and I don't think that was anyone/thing's doing but God's solely. Over the last year, I've been waking up from the grief-induced comatose state that I've been in & looked around and realized the tattered soul I'd become. My writing suffered. My spirit suffered. I was more concerned with having a quick comeback for a smart remark rather than a fulfilled life. My daughter is still young enough to forgive me, thank God.
The point is there are going to be temporary setbacks in everyone's life. What it is & how big it is, we may or may not have control over. We do have control on how we let that setback affect our lives. Some things you can bounce back quickly from...others, like me, it may take 4 years...the point is, you bounce back. You stand up. Nothing worth having is ever easy. True love is fought for & you bleed hard, but you bounce back. A real life, a legacy to leave--these things do not COME EASY but they come.
"If you believe in what you are doing, then let nothing hold you up in your work. Much of the best work of the world has been done against seeming impossibilities. The thing is to get the work done." (Dale Carnegie)
Peace & Love,
Jaz
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